Sunday, April 1, 2012

Let's get started...

So this is my very first blog. I have no experience with writing at all. I am expecting to have at least one typo in every post. I'm not even sure exactly what I'm supposed to blog about, but I just feel the need to let my thoughts out....even if nobody ends up reading it.

I have really noticed a scary thing about myself recently. You know that little voice that pops into your head and says "maybe you shouldn't do that" well, it seems like I haven't been listening to that voice lately. I feel really stupid because that stupid voice is always right. I've been making very stupid mistakes, one while driving with my man and baby in the car. If Joey hadn't grabbed the wheel we would have been in big trouble. *sigh*

I need to change the way I handle things, I need to change a lot of things about myself. I know that everything changes, I kinda ended up hating that quote "the only thing constant is change!" but only because it pops into my head every single time I think about anything that has to do with change....I think I hate that voice in my head so I purposely ignore it. What am I 16? Why do I feel like I have to rebel against my better judgement? You know I think I can figure a lot about myself just by pouring my thoughts out here. Self therapy isn't the best but I hope to at least keep my crazy in a cage if it has to be by my side all the time.

By the way, I see my crazy as a separate entity from myself...a little raving mad beast at my side that hides unnoticed until it decides to rear its ugly little head. My crazy always makes an appearance if I've had too much to drink....eeegh, those were some REALLY bad times. My crazy has almost torn my relationship apart. I honestly don't know why Joey ever stayed with me after the last time my crazy came out. I have since decided that alcohol is NOT worth the trouble it causes me....I never really liked the taste anyway. Sometimes my crazy is a monster with gnashing teeth and other times it is just a black cloud weeping and bringing everyone else around me down. There's the jealous green-eyed monster that Joey loves to prod with his comments about how great Rihanna looks. I KNOW HOW GREAT RIHANNA LOOKS! Ahem...
My crazy has many forms but it is always at my side no matter how much I would just like to leave it at home for once...

Well this blog is going to be like taking my crazy out for a walk, let it stretch its legs...or hooves, or claws, or whatever other shape it decides to take.


  1. I think you are smart to write your thoughts down. There is nothing wrong with self-therapy (as long as it is the healthy kind...)! I wrote after I had Josh to help me cope with being a new mom, and it really helped a lot. I think it is a good thing, and I think you will have a great time! Plus, I get to spy on you and cheer you on at the same time. :P
    P.S. Alcohol has too many calories anyway. Ha ha ha!
    P.S.S. Rihanna may look good, but she is totally messed up. She should start a blog.